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America is a great big heart attack. ~Carrie Latet

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A man is not old until regrets take the place of dreams. ~John Barrymore

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Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't. ~Erica Jong, How to Save Your Own Life, 1977

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Sometimes the biggest act of courage is a small one. ~Lauren Raffo

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Polished brass will pass upon more people than rough gold. ~Lord Chesterfield

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How beautiful it is to do nothing, and then to rest afterward. ~Spanish Proverb

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Hair style is the final tip-off whether or not a woman really knows herself. ~Hubert de Givenchy, Vogue, July 1985

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Masturbation: the primary sexual activity of mankind. In the nineteenth century it was a disease; in the twentieth, it's a cure. ~Thomas Szasz

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Always serve too much hot fudge sauce on hot fudge sundaes. It makes people overjoyed, and puts them in your debt. ~Judith Olney

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I dropped a tear in the ocean. The day you find it is the day I will stop missing you. ~Author Unknown

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We have all taken risks in the making of war. Isn't it time that we should take risks to secure peace? ~J. Ramsay MacDonald

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So long as all the increased wealth which modern progress brings goes but to build up great fortunes, to increase luxury and make sharper the contrast between the House of Have and the House of Want, progress is not real and cannot be permanent. ~Henry George, Progress and Poverty, 1879

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I want a priest, a rabbi, and a Protestant clergyman. I want to hedge my bets. ~Wilson Mizner

Birthday Phonebooth 17

Springtime is the land awakening. The March winds are the morning yawn. ~Quoted by Lewis Grizzard in Kathy Sue Loudermilk, I Love You

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You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give. ~Kahlil Gibran

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A cat is the only domestic animal I know who toilet trains itself and does a damned impressive job of it. ~Joseph Epstein

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Part of the issue of achievement is to be able to set realistic goals, but that's one of the hardest things to do because you don't always know exactly where you're going, and you shouldn't. ~George Lucas

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Seventy-five percent of our planet is water - can you swim? ~Author Unknown

Funny Retirement Quotes

You can't wring your hands and roll up your sleeves at the same time. ~Pat SchroederMisery is almost always the result of thinking. ~Joseph JoubertWhat is conservatism? Is it not adherence to the old and tried, against the new and untried? ~Abraham LincolnThe trouble with using experience as a guide is that the final exam often comes first and then the lesson. ~Author UnknownPolitical history is far too criminal and pathological to be a fit subject of study for the young. Children should acquire their heroes and villains from fiction. ~W.H. Auden, A Certain WorldIf I could find a real-life place that made me feel like Tiffany's, then I'd buy some furniture and give the cat a name. ~Truman Capote, Breakfast at Tiffany's, 1958, spoken by the character Holly Golightly